I’m a Nut For Pondering Skulls!

I’ve got to admit to a guilty pleasure of mine: PONDERING HUMAN SKULLS!

I guess you could say I was bitten by the ponder bug at an early age when I held my first skull while learning about the origins of bad habits at Booger Camp (pictured above).

I liked the ponderous way holding a skull made me look, and I liked the ponderfull way it made me feel when I looked at it and wondered about stuff: “What color is God’s skin? What would I do if God turned out to be kind of a sickly jaundiced shade? Where the heck do skulls come from anyway?”

After returning home, I spent every last penny of my milk money on skulls (today, I am four and a half feet tall due to severe calcium deficiencies). I tried out for every school play that involved pondering a human skull: Hamlet, Fiddler on The Roof, Death of a Skull Salesman, The Best Little Whorehouse Made of Skulls in Texas. I was never cast, but I received great word-of-mouth reviews as an attentive and respectful audience member.

I’ve tried pondering femurs, baskets of fruit, dead cats, alive cats, but nothing stimulates the mind & also the brain quite like a skull. So put down your lit cigarette. Drop your crystal amulet. Slowly pour acid on your Rubik’s cube. AND PICK UP A SKULL! You wont be disappointed (unless you’re not really into skulls).