Attention Foodies: Hi.

Hi fellow foodies. If you like food and know more about it than anyone else at the table, every time, then you might be a foodie. Just like me! Hi!!!

If you're NOT a foodie, let me explain what being a foodie is about. At the risk of sounding pretentious, I, as a foodie, am able to enjoy food in ways that if a non-foodie (our nickname for you people is "pieces of shit") were to experience, it would send him/her into a spiral of madness resulting in PERMANENT INSANITY. But to me, its just another day at a church.

Church?

That's right church. Rustic Italian food is my God. 3 bean soup with a dollop of homemade goat cheese is my St Jesus. Very good, medium priced wine is my The Three Wise Men. Betcha didn't know that about foodies. Perhaps you pieces of shits should stop assuming you know EVERYTHING so I can go back to talking loudly about how duck fat is the most baroque fat.

A very sarcastic "thanks",

Rudy The Foodie


PS: YEAH OBAMA!!!!! (non sarcastic)